President Obama and Congress look to avert $85 billion in automatic across-the-board spending cuts scheduled for March 1. Watch CNN.com Live for continuing coverage of the sequestration crisis.
Today's programming highlights...
10:00 am ET - Sequestration threat hearing - Three Cabinet secretaries and others will testify before a Senate committee on how the threatened spending cuts would affect their departments.
11:15 am ET - Boehner weekly briefing - Sequestration will also be on the mind of House Speaker John Boehner when he holds his weekly briefing with reporters. House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi holds a similar briefing at 2:30 pm ET.
12:30 pm ET - Jodi Arias murder trial - Jodi Arias is expected to continue her testimony at her murder trial in Arizona. She is accused of killing her ex-boyfriend, Travis Alexander, in 2008.
1:00 pm ET - Obama talks education - President Obama travels to Decatur, Georgia, where he'll discuss his vision for education at a school.
7:30 pm ET (est.) - Crippled cruise ship returns to U.S. - Four days after an engine fire caused numerous malfunctions, the Carnival Triumph cruise ship will dock in Mobile, Alabama.
CNN.com Live is your home for breaking news as it happens.
My vision for good education? Free, flexible, intelligent, and rational....and integrated with healthcare and basic needs.
Yeah, it'll never happen....
What i want to know is wth is Jodi Arias??
A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied, “You know, it’s the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer.”
Time Joke 2
A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He decided to stop at the next city he came to, and park somewhere quiet so he could get an hour or two of sleep. As luck would have it, the quiet place he chose happened to be on one of the city’s major jogging routes. No sooner had he settled back to snooze when there came a knocking on his window. He looked out and saw a jogger running in place. “Yes?” “Excuse me, sir,” the jogger said, “do you have the time?” The man looked at the car clock and answered, “8:15″. The jogger said thanks and left. The man settled back again, and was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window and another jogger. “Excuse me, sir, do you have the time?” “8:25!” The jogger said thanks and left. Now the man could see other joggers passing by and he knew it was only a matter of time before another o ne disturbed him. To avoid the problem, he got out a pen and paper and put a sign in his window saying, “I do not know the time!” Once again he settled back to sleep. He was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window. “Sir, sir? It’s 8:45!.”
Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow inmates. The warden saw that deep down, Andy was a good person and made arrangements for Andy to learn a trade while doing his time. After three years, Andy was recognized as one of the best carpenters in the local area. Often he would be given a weekend pass to do odd jobs for the citizens of the community.... and he always reported back to prison before Sunday night was over. The warden was thinking of remodeling his kitchen and in fact had done much of the work himself. But he lacked the skills to build a set of kitchen cupboards and a large counter top which he had promised his wife. So he called Andy into his office and asked him to complete the job for him. But, alas, Andy refused. He told the warden, "Gosh, I'd really like to help you but counter fitting is what got me into prison in the first place".
Everybody's a critic.
A woman woke her husband in the middle of the night. "There's a burglar downstairs eating the cake that I made this morning." "Who shall I call," her husband asked, "police or ambulance?"
@bobcat(iah) Thank you for the gift of a smile.
Good to see you. How are you doing ? They've been rather generous to me for a change, in leaving my jokes up. I probably shouldn't have said that as I'm sure they'll now do the disappearing act. POOF
Happy Velentine's Day, everyone.
Rawr: thanks for the chuckles. Everyone's a critic? Nah, not me; I liked the joke....and all of the others.
And Happy Valentine to you too. That critic thing was a response to TTGR who had said, "Now I see why your posts get deleted."
I hope you all remember the true meaning of the feast of St. Valentine. This is not a day to get all juiced up and have wild s3xual relations with each other, especially if you are not married.
Oh, what do I care. I'm quitting anyway. Go wild everybody.
Don't listen to him. He's old and senile. Today is a day of prayer and Lenten observance. I hope my brother is paying attention.
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